Hangover Remedy?

The top five sandwiches/hangover cures/heart attack on a stick creations from Maxim readers:

5. The Comfort Zone
By Sean Fitzgerald
It’s carb-heavy. It’s easy to put together. It’s what’s for dinner.

The construction:
Like all good tales of glory, it starts with a hero. A nine-inch Italian hero, to be exact. Cut the roll open, remove the excess bread, and replace it with a spicy, deep-fried chicken cutlet. Next, add the two essential condiments, homemade mashed potatoes and Kraft mac ’n’ cheese. Then dump on some black pepper. Got dry mouth? That’s what the bowl of dippin’ gravy is for, pothead.

The Earl of Sandwich says: “Take ye olde phone off the hook, switch on yon SportsCenter, and wash down with a thick, import stout.”


4. The Dirty Mother
By Mark Pitman, Scott Martin, and Steve Brady
Finally, something nastier than a Waffle House breakfast.

The construction:
Use two slices of buttery Texas toast as bookends, and slap together a sausage patty, hash browns, and three generous chops of ham, separating each layer with a slice of cheddar cheese. Throw two fried eggs in the mix (sunnyside up, Nancy), and comfort them with four strips of crispy bacon. A splash of ketchup or Worcestershire sauce is your choice, but tons of S&P is mandatory.

The Earl of Sandwich says: “This creation is best consumed whilst watching the sun rise, with an empty bucket at the ready…or not.”


3. The Destroyer
By Bradley Hirota
Stomach pain and crippling gas never hurt so good.

The construction:
Slice a loaf of French bread down the middle (mind the fingers). Layer the inside with pastrami, ham, and provolone cheese, then set it in the broiler for a few. Meanwhile, fry up some garlic, mushrooms, and onions in salted olive oil, while at the same time simmering three precooked meatballs in a shallow pool of marinara sauce in a separate pan. Throw everything onto the now-toasted blunt and blast it with BBQ sauce. Top with Parmesan cheese, red pepper, Tabasco sauce, bacon, and onion rings. Now open your mouth and commence deep-throating.

The Earl of Sandwich says: “When the harsh realities of living hath worn thee down, eat this. It will take years off thine life, but the experience is truly trouser-tickling.”


2. The Salty Dog
By Gavin Snyder
We used to hate the ocean and everything in it…till now.

The construction:
On a 10-inch sub roll, combine fried clam strips, fried shrimp, and bacon. Add shoestring potatoes, tomatoes, and romaine lettuce. Top with Russian dressing, Tabasco sauce, and Old Bay seasoning until your eyes water.

The Earl of Sandwich says: “Best eaten post-2 A.M., when that blitzkrieg at yon local watering hole hath left ye insides pasted on yon outside.”


1. Da Bitchin’ Fat Camaro
By S.C. Welch
It can’t burn rubber, but it’ll burn clean through your colon.

The construction:
Start with a nine-inch French bread sandwich roll and slice it down the center, so it ends up looking like a giant clamshell. Bake the bread so the outside gets crunchy, and the inside stays soft and moist. Lather the bread with canned chili, then drop in two quarter-pound bratwursts, along with two chopped-up dill pickle spears, diced white onions, and shredded sharp cheddar cheese. Wrap that sumbitch in butcher paper and let it marinate while you put your cardiologist on speed dial.

The Earl of Sandwich says: “Be sure that thou hast a frosty ale on hand and plenty of napkins nearby. Or at least the end of yon dress.”

I'm chewing on a couple of aspirin and anticipating an infarc now just from reading the ingredient list. Hmmm, I have one that I make, but maybe I'll post it up a bit further up the thread. It's REALLY excessive, and involves farm animals, heavy equipment and LOTS of money! LOL

Cheers,

Oskaar

Dan,

I've always preferred large heavy meals on the rare occasions I've had a hangover. My feeling has always been the more protein, vitamins and minerals you can get into your system the better. The best remedy I've found though is to head off the hangover all together, and the best way I've found to do this is to take a double dose of multivitamins with a large glass of water just before retiring for the night, this has warded off hangovers for me without fail. My favorite hangover/post party breakfast is half a family size Papa Murphy's Chicago style Stuffed Pizza or a large Quizno's Classic Italian Sub

Wrathwilde

When it comes to hangovers, I am a total baby. My liver seems to be able to handle just about any poison I accidentaly ingest (she said she did not know it was rat poison!!!), but alcohol has its number. The only meal that has ever worked to either avert or cure a hangover, depending on when it was eaten, was a large plate of Chicken Tindaloo (HOT > > >), Rice Biryani, Keema Naan bread, followed up by a bowl of Goolab Jamun. Probably has more to do with the large quantities of water needed to counter the heat of the food, but works for me. Greasy too.

Angus

Don't know why it worked, but cold pizza and dill pickles worked for me back in the day.

The best food I ran across after an all night bender..... Burger King....I would never have thought it until after a few military buddies talked me into it. I figured all that grease and garbage would have me heaving, but after onion rings and a Whopper, I was good to go.

Chris

...
Having just listened to the song it got me wondering just how many pounds to a stone... as he claims to have lost 3 stone. A quick trip to google produced some obscure english weights and measures. Just to make you take the trip yourself I won't mention what a stone equals. ;D

Wrathwilde

The end all hangover cures are found at Okie Dogs, here in Los Angeles.

#1) The Okie dog; 2 - 1/4lb hotdogs, covered with pastrami, smothered in chilli then wrapped in a jumbo tortilla with onions.

#2) Okie Fries; 1/2lb hot french fries, covered with a 1/4lb pastrami then onions and chilli. If thats not enough just ask and they'll fry up two eggs to top them with.

My preferred method for avoiding a hang over is to stay drunk.

Demented

Just thinking about an Okie Dog makes my insides quake.

Dmntd

I think I just had a coronary reading what is in the Okie Dog. Damn..

LOL Yabodie,

So long as you don't even drive by that place more then once or twice a year, you'll be okay.

Dmntd

Man .... I don't know .... most of these "remedies" would probably make me puke in a hurry if I were to eat one when I have a hangover. Typically, all I can stomach is some Diet Coke !!!!!

Am I the only one ?

The heavy foods seem to find work for the acids in your stomach... instead of letting them roil around undisturbed making you feel ill. It's been my experience that the more food you force down the less nauseous you'll feel, especially if a good percentage is bread. Eat just a few nibbles and it's likely you'll remain nauseous, this is the one time in life it pays to be a quick eater... OK, actually there are several times in life when it pays, but thats beside the point. It doesn't matter if you're not hungry or nauseous and couldn't think of anything less appealing than food at the moment. I've seen both types of people on many occasions over years and years and years of partying. Those who merely pick at their food will often bring it back up when severely hung over, those who chow down rarely do. That's my experience and story and I'm sticking to it. Also try and stay away from anything sour or citrusy right off the bat as this will almost always throw your stomach into turmoil quicker than you can say "I think I'm going to be...".

Wrathwilde

I'm a big believer in prevention as you can ask folks from the Mead Festival who partied with me. I drink water and gatorade/powerade frequently (like every two glasses of mead, wine, beer, etc.) I take the chaser tablets, and multi-vitamins, along with B-complex supplements and a couple aspirin when I finally do fall asleep.

Cheers,

Oskaar

Most of my hangovers are on Sunday morning after a weekend SCA event. I dig into a cooler more full of cold water than ice pull out two cold hot dogs some cheese and the butter. Split a hoagie roll, butter it and get some pringles, olives, and maybe a few slices of peperoni (if my wife has left any). I crash out in my viking chair and drink several large mugs of citrus punch (never bothered me)
I then follow this with several hour of packing, tent disassembly, site cleaning, and a two to five hour drive. Get home unload the truck, stuff everything back into the closet. Take a quick shower and pass out till some time around midnight. By that time I don't even remember I had a hangover.
Tarot.

Tarot,

Sounds to much like work for me.

I'll take an Okie dog, side of okie fries and a pint of Bass Ale any day.

Dmntd

My most memorable hangover cure involved standing precariously between subway cars in NYC as the "N" train roared underneath the East River, and doing a knees-rattling Technicolor Yawn. There's nothing like the combination of keeping your balance for the sake of your very life; feeling the rush of hot, humid, stinky air; and evacuating your churning stomach contents -- all while being careful not to hit the third rail with your puke stream -- to put you in the pink!

-David

Ack - Don't talk to me about hangovers...

In the Hogfather - a discworld novell by Terry Pratchett - there is a god of hangovers. Every time someone wakes up going like: "Wow! Been drinking all night! Colorful things with umbrella's in it, wine, beer, mead... and I feel good!" The god however carries the weight of all hangovers that should be... Making him have the hangover of the world, so to speak.

Now... That could be me :-\ I can wake up after an evening of drinking 2 pints, and be ill. Ok, given, that happened maybe twice, but still... My hangovers are terrible, always the same, and plentifull. I have to lay completely still in the bed, not even turning around, or it'll upset my stomach, which makes me run to worship the porcelain altar...

So... I have some experience in try beating the bloody things

Things said before, and completely right: eat heavy! Why? Well lift a feather or a brick. The brick is harder the lift, the same is with yr stomach. It is heavy? It stays down. Preferably I eat very little bread-like things (a slice or one roll). Because bread fills quickly, but is not heavy at all. Tomato is good and spicy stuff as well (tabasco). So are eggs and sausages swimming in grease.

Also, most of the time a hangover takes some time to kick in, so you got a timeframe of about 15-30 minutes to take precautions. Wake up to a large glass of water, drink it with 1-2 painkillers and a Renny tablet (settles the stomach). Now move to your kitchen, take a plate, put a slice of bread on it, liberally add tabasco, cover it with tomatoes and a slice of cheese (I like cheese). Put a generous amount of butter in the pan and fry a couple of sausages and an egg. Put the sausages on top of the cheese, and top with the egg. Eat! I would avoid drinking coffee, as cafeine is not too good on a hangover. Good drinks are green tea (my choice - detox), cafeine-free energy drinks or sports drinks. After breakfast take cold shower or bath. Again why? Well I never feel ill -stomach wise- while doing either, so it gives yr body time to process the food and painkillers. Then I take some time to squeeze out 2 oranges and a lemon - for the vitamines. Then, go for a walk. Movement and fresh air will do you good, helps burn things. If you still feel under the water afterwards, do just that: go under the water, go swimming. Sport is good, and the water is refreshing.

Other reflections: a hair of the dog... does not work for me... The smell of alcohol or even the thought -bleh- no thanks. The thing which is best is off course, just to stay drunk. Don't go to sleep, keep boozing and switch to a normal lifestyle in the morning. I once spent a memorabel 7 days in a row drinking constantly and sleeping an hour a day. We were setting up a party (tents and the whole bunch + night watch). So it was working with a pint - never got drunk though. Just beer was the drink of choice

Ooh, important, do not neglect the evening. After boozing drink about a liter of water, take a painkiller, maybe some vitamines. Better to prevent than to cure. Even if it doesn't cure, it'll probably lessen the impact.

And last but not least, the best cure ever, which I used in my student days (so about 2 years ago ). Well... There is a time and a place for everything, and it is called college. Do that, and you will hardly be able to stand on yr legs, you will crash down for 30 min, and wake up completely refreshed with no thought about a hangover whatsoever.

Mmmmh... this has gotten to a long post... Mjeh

EDIT: Cool guide against hangovers http://www.blurofinsanity.com/hung.html

May your days be free of hangovers! ;D

Having spent three-and-a-half years living in the Delta Tau Delta house at Ohio Wesleyan, I feel the need to chime in on this rather important, all-too-often overlooked problem.

Naturally, being a beer drinker, I conditioned myself, over the years, to be relatively hangover-resistant. I have, in "one sitting," polished off a 30-pack of Gennessee Cream Ale, and felt fine the next day. (It took 12 hours, but I did it!!! I made a suit of armor out of the cans...)

SIDEBAR: There is one (AND ONLY ONE) beer that can put the hurt on me; Miller Lite. God help me if I so much as sniff that crap in the course of a night. The last time I drank that stuff, I couldn't move THAT NIGHT because I felt like my head was in a vise...

SO...

Alas, the consumption of wine and spirits seems to give me a jostle from time to time. In those rare instances, as my dear wife says, "Waffle House and Beer." I prefer a Burt's Sausage Melt, waffle, eggs, bacon, and grits, chased by a piss-warm GCA or similarly gravitied quaff... Keep it all down, and you're good to go!

Back in the days when no keg was left untapped and undrunk the best hangover relief for me was good old Alka Seltzer in a glass of cold water at the end of the evening. If I could keep it down then I would be ok whenever I woke up :-\
I tried the hair of the dog a few times, didn't like it, had a couple of buddies who ended up drinking 24/7 because of doing the hair of the dog. A big meal in the morning did seem to help unless it comes back up. When in real bad shape a ice cold regular Pepsi can snap you around for two or three hours. Nothing like caffine and sugar ;D