Yep, we don't bite (not hard anyway)... and we do generally answer the same questions from newbies over and over without too much bitching, but do please check out the search function...
Biggest hint I'll give to a new meadmaker after "read the Newbee guide" is get a hydrometer, you'll need one if you want to do more than guess about the state of your fermentations.
"The main ingredient needed is 'time' followed closely by 'patience'." - The Bishop 2013
"Good grief! If someone wanted to murder you, all they would have to do is ship you a 55 gallon barrel of honey and watch you document working yourself to death!" - Vance G
"When you consider that laziness and procrastination are the fundamentals of great mead, it is a miracle that the mazer cup happens." Medsen Fey, 2014